I missed something

have you ever feel like this is your last day for anything and everything? well wow im just feeling it. I miss the most happiness in my life.Although i'v to laugh everyday but there's one that never appeared. I dont know what it is but i feel like i jst wanna cry, i dont know for what. I just want it, but i think i dont have to. So i keep my tears and promise to never cry for the unkown reason.